Wendys Opening Speech What to Avoid

Ten things for Wendy to avoid while giving her conference opening speech.

  1. Wearing red. (Makes you look like a corpse).
  2. Picking your nose.
  3. Attempting any jokes.
  4. Letting Alex Salmond in the room.
  5. Upsetting your speech writer.
  6. Telling everyone at conference ‘the party is back on track’
  7. Being condescending (alright almost impossible to avoid).
  8. Don’t end with the words alrrrrrrright in a Welsh accent.
  9. Waiting for a standing ovation.
  10. Reading this.

And take that worried look of your face

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